Actual Thing That Happened At Work
- Setting: Local community center, where a group of 10 cub scouts all seven- or eight-years-old have met to make 80 bologna sandwiches. They then packed the sandwiches in bags along with an apple to donate to a church, which runs a program every day where it gives food to anybody who wants. I'm there to write a story about the group. I will be ME, MAX is the cub scout troop leader guy and LAUREN is his wife.
- Lauren: So what do you need the kids to do?
- Me: Oh, nothing. I'll just walk around and get some pictures of them working, and then after it's done I was hoping to briefly speak with Max and maybe a few of the kids.
- Lauren: Ah, great. Maybe we could get them all together for a group shot when they're done.
- Me: That would be great.
- Max [loud enough so this could be heard across the room and over the sound of 10 young kids talking while making sandwiches]: Lauren knows a thing or two about group shots!
- This has been an Actual Thing That Happened At Work. Goodbye.
You know what? I think we’re good keeping this between us, computer.
Who Has The Sweetest Dreams?
I don’t have as much time as I’d like to sit around thinking about nonsense, which is unfortunate because I think I’m pretty great at it. Or at least pretty great at wasting time doing it. But recently I heard a song on the radio that led me down a pretty heated battle in my head.
That battle was over which version of a song titled “Sweet Dreams” I like the most. There are a bunch, some covers, but I think the covers I considered are done in a way where it feels like a pretty different song. When I typed “Sweet Dreams (song)” into Wikipedia, 11 songs came up.
See? Not all of them have their own entry. I’m not going to run through all 11, though. I don’t know all those versions, so they don’t matter. I looked up the Vamps version, because that song had its own entry, and the Vamps are a Japanese rock band, and much less awesome than a Japanese rock band could be. At least on that song. Onward!
Okay, I’ve picked the six best versions, best being the ones I was familiar with, including this most recent entry that prompted this entire post. We’ll get to that song in a bit, though. Right now, let’s start off with I guess the most famous song titled “Sweet Dreams,” “Sweet Dreams.”
This one is by Eurythmics. We’ve all heard this one. Synths. Red hair in the video. Classic. It’s got everything. Who am I to disagree? It’s also got those great background vocals. This one will be hard to beat, I imagine.
Next up is the first cover of this song. Using the ultimate source of all the world’s knowledge, Wikipedia, once again, this song has somewhere north of 20 different covers. I think this one is the most famous of them.
It’s Marilyn Manson! This version is pretty terrifying, and the video is even more so. I feel like this was a music video that scared me as a little child. And as a 23-year-old. Really, just go to the 3:13 mark in the above video. The video itself is fine, but just listen to what’s going on there. It’s got maybe the oddest buildup in any song; it goes from barely audible groan-singing to brief high-pitched talk-singing and then into Marilyn Manson yelling, which is a special kind of yelling. Oh, and he’s screaming “Some of them want to use you/ Some of them want to get used by you.” After the yelling, though, it goes into that deep, echo-y Manson singing while he says “Some of them want to abuse you/ Some of them want to be abused.” Then guitars. This is really just an unpleasant experience in the absolute best kind of way. He/She really made his/her own.
Now, it’s time for the last Eurythmics cover on the list, and the song I just heard recently that got me thinking about this whole “Sweet Dreams” dilema.
This one is by Bat For Lashes, who I know very little about. I know she’s a lady (or a band with a lady singer) who has this song “Daniel” that I heard and enjoyed, and that had a kind of bizarre video. Her version kind of hypnotized me when I heard it. I was very drawn to it and didn’t want to do anything but listen to it while it was on the radio. It’s also a lot closer to the original version than Marilyn Manson’s. So if it’s not obvious yet, this is one of my favorite versions. But I couldn’t decide if it was my favorite, which brings us here. To the other three versions.
And we’ll kickoff the back end with Beyonce. This one came during that period where Beyonce always had two background dancers with her. No, not later-day Destiny’s Child. The other one. Zing! Anyway, I have no idea what’s going on this video. Beyonce and friends are dancing in a windy desert (it’s always windy where ever Beyonce is, though, so you should’ve guessed that part), and Beyonce’s wearing this shiny black sheet. Then everyone is dressed for a cocktail party, and then Beyonce’s a robot. As for the song itself, it’s pretty okay. I wouldn’t rank it as one of my favorite Beyonce songs, but that’d also require me to have a list of favorite Beyonce songs. I don’t. Yet. That can be arranged. Anyway, this one’s fine.
Next up is “Sweet Dreams” by La Bouche. La Bouche, you should remember, as the biggest hit-making dance music group of the 1990s. Note: I might’ve made that up, but in my memories of the decade, La Bouche was massive. Really, any La Bouche song should make you want to dress up like the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, take ecstasy and dance like Elaine from Seinfeld. I think I covered everything, right? Anyway, here’s where this, and all other La Bouche songs, win: the dude in the group’s rap verse. Always feels a little out of place, yet always elevates the song. La Bouche might be my The Beatles. Let’s move on before I embarrass myself anymore.
Okay, the last one is a country staple and I picked the Patsy Cline version because I’ve heard of her. Okay, honesty time: I hadn’t heard this version before. I wanted an even number and only had five. I know nothing about country music. I kind of wish I knew more, because sometimes when I hear, it sounds pretty good. Mostly, though, I don’t care. So here’s this version.
Alright, there are the six versions of “Sweet Dreams.” Let’s cut the list in half, and get rid of the versions by Marilyn Manson, Beyonce and Patsy Cline. Also, let’s reflect on how awesome that last sentence was. Anyway, out of those versions, I’d probably say I listed them in order of how I’d rank them. I could switch the Manson and Beyonce versions, but the Beyonce one isn’t Beyonce enough for me and the Manson one is so Manson I won’t switch them.
So we’re left with “Sweet Dreams” by Eurythmics, a cover of that song by Bat For Lashes and an entirely different song by La Bouche. Now, here’s where things get tricky. I think all three of these are pretty outstanding. Right now, my inclination is to say I like the Bat For Lashes version more than the original, but I have a few reservations about doing so. First off, I just heard it for the first time, so it’s still new, and I’m comparing it to a song that’s been insanely popular my entire life that I’ve heard countless times. Who knows if I’ll like this Bat For Lashes version next month? Also, the cover sounds very similar to the original, so I feel a bit weird ranking it higher. Anyway, you know what this means, right?
La Bouche wins!
Man, this one is so good, right, you guys? Isn’t La Bouche the best? I think so. Want to know some of my other favorite La Bouche songs?
I guess that’s it. There are other songs I like that I thought was La Bouche that I know see are not. But that’s not important.
What is important is I believe I just tricked you into reading a La Bouche appreciation post!
Tune in next week when I write about Real McCoy!
(Source: watchthecradle)
(Source: kanyedbythebell)
It’s still early, but I just want to throw it out there that I believe this picture I took while covering a Halloween parade today has set the bar at a decent height for all your Halloween 2011 photos. Act accordingly.
Pretty fucked up, NY Magazine. Pretty fucked up.
Watch The Throne Review
On “Who Gon Stop Me,” Jay-Z says the following:
This is the biggest problem with the album, because every time I hear all the uses of “nope” I think Jay-Z is about to make some Leslie Knope or Parks & Recreation reference, but he never does. And I think it every time I listen to the song, like the lyrics are going to change if I listen to it enough. There should’ve been a Parks & Recreation reference there. Is Jay-Z friends with Aziz Ansari? Aren’t all famous rappers friends with Aziz Ansari? Anyway, this was undoubtedly the worst part of Watch The Throne. Besides “Made In America.” That song is fucking horrible. Jesus, do I dislike that song. So there you have it. This has been my Watch The Throne review.Like broke, Like nope, Like ha,
I ain’t no joke, I can’t be stopped
Like nope, Like nope
I call this picture SUBTLE: Just Give Up.
Thing I Said To My Family Tonight That They Didn’t Get, Which Is Good, Because It’s Gross and They Would Think Worse of Me If They Understood
I’m really hoping it’s more coincidental than prophetic that I started reading Lolita the same week I got assigned to cover a bunch of 11- and 12-year-old girls softball games.
